If you and your spouse are facing problems in your marriage, it doesn't mean the marriage has to be over. In fact, it might just mean that you both have to be willing to work at fixing the problems you're facing. It also means that you have to be willing to accept responsibility for your contribution to the marital problems. If the problems you're facing are too big for you and your spouse to work through on your own, you may want to consider couples counseling. Here are three tips that will help ensure successful counseling sessions.

Change Begins with You

It's easy to focus on the changes that your spouse needs to make. However, focusing on your spouse won't necessarily facilitate the changes that need to occur. For effective counseling, you need to recognize that change begins with you. Before you begin couples counseling, take the time to identify changes that you need to make in your own life that will help heal the problems you're facing in your marriage. By identifying your contribution to the marital problems, you'll be less inclined to place blame solely on your partner.

Keep Your Eye on the Goal

Before you begin counseling, consider the big picture – specifically the goals you have for your counseling sessions. When setting goals for counseling, consider the direction you want your marriage to take. It can be difficult to work on marital problems when you aren't focused on reaching those goals. For instance, if you're determined to make your marriage work, it can be difficult to work through the problems if you're focused entirely on the momentary issues you're facing.

Be Prepared to Work

Counseling isn't going to fix your marriage overnight. It's going to take work to heal the issues that are causing turmoil in your marriage. If you want your marriage to work, you have to be ready to work. That means not giving up when counseling gets difficult. It's also important to note that you shouldn't stop counseling as soon as you make a break-through. Ending counseling before the problems have been fully addressed can lead to bigger problems later on.

If you and your spouse are having marital problems, you owe it to yourselves to try and work through those problems. Relationship counseling, offer by people like Sharon O'Connell, MA, can help you heal the problems that are plaguing your marriage. The tips provided here will make counseling more effective for you and your spouse.